Silence

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As per the plan I was waiting next to the Lions Gym, around hundred meters south of the Sankhamul Chowk. I pulled the cell phone from the pocket and had a look on the clock. ‘Uff, just 8:03am’. I breathe heavily and the gulp of air loomed around my face like the puff of smoke. Though the sun had graded through the scattering cloud on the east, the streets of Kathmandu were still arctic. Nothing to get busy with, I turned around; ‘Janakpur Paan Pasal’ on the left and ‘the Lions Gym’ on the right. But ‘Shrestha Tea House’ the board behind me caught the attention. I climbed couple of stair, dumped my bag and settled myself on the wooden chair. ‘Sauji, one milk tea’, I placed the order.
As Sauji and his toddler assistant was busy processing my order, I gazed across the street. Vegetable vendor were in the pinnacle of their business, trespassing half of the road with their cart and mobile shops. The remaining half was overflowed by their client (I mean the housewives) and the vehicle.
The teenage couple appeared from the crowd. The boy had silky hair; the perfect Korean hairstyle, and the I-phone in his hand (predictable style of teenage lads these days). The girl, who was in a college dress, was shivering with the cold and had pulled the sleeve of sweater to wrap around her palm to make a glove. As all her effort to keep warm went in vain, she pulled him closer by grabbing his arm and placed her hand in his pocket. Wow she found the better solution to fight with the cold (then a cup of tea like me). The boy gave a quick glance at her. The girl smiled in return, the textbook gesture to show the gratitude. It need not be said that he felt the warmth of her love; the comprehensible glow that arises in his face with contempt speaks it all. The girl pulled the ear phone from him pocket, put one plug in her ear and the others in his. Suddenly the romance fired up in the air. And probably the Justin Biber or Taylor Swift’s (they didn’t seemed to me the Pink Floyd type) playlist catalyses them.
On the background the middle aged gentleman came riding the classic hero rangers bicycle. He had scarf in his shoulder. Unlike the teenager he had perfectly combed side parted hair that reminds you of angry young man of Bollywood in late 70’s. The dabaang beard and the belly pant had spiced his Bollywood personality further. He was whistling and enjoying the ride. Despite his swarthy face, the smile and the pleasure he was having had made him substantially good-looking.
‘Trrrringgg Trrringgg’. He ringed twice but the couple didn’t care about it. And how could they when their ears were buzzing with Justin Biber and Taylor Swift. So he drove past them, turned around and stopped just in front of the couple. The couple almost bumped on the bicycle. The contempt glow of the boy a moment ago was now devoured by rage.
‘Sale dhoti aakha dekhdainas’.
The boy sneered like a wolf sneered to the deer. I don’t know why but I looked at the girls. Deep inside me was expecting the positive interruption from the girl. But she was reluctant to take a stage.
Boy’s face was glowing with the valor he had just staged, and why wouldn’t it if he had some gorgeous by his side silently observing him, to prove his chivalry to?
He grabbed his girlfriends hand and they moved on giggling and I was traumatized on the wooden chair.
‘How could he be so mean with someone about the age of his father?
The gentleman did not ventured to react; instead he tried to hide the humiliation he had just gone through. His gloomy and silent nod was enough for me to understand the mental state he was going through. The streak of bitter emotion had engulfed the cheerful face of his. His silence seemed so mundane that he was drinking this humiliation all his life. He balanced the bicycle by pulling it to the hoarding board. He had his own business, they had theirs; he opened the door of ‘Janakpur Paan Pasal’ and they disappeared in the crowd.

The bike on the other side of the road clanked the horn. I waived him and signaled to join me.
‘Sauji make it two’. I notified my host, ‘I have a company’. As my friend was crossing the road I sighed with relief. Firstly, the wait was over for me, and secondly because it was hell of a scene I had witness.

In spite of all the efforts I made, I could not in the least enters into the feelings of that gentleman and understand his sentiments and the silence he put on the show a moment ago. Had there been some Pahadi in his place, I need not have to imagine boy getting his face disfigured. Good for the boy it was Madhesi, bad for the gentleman it was the Jaundiced Pahadi kid.

Flip Love

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Couple of week back the vibration in my cell phone waked me up at 5:30am. I reached for the cell without opening my eyes.
‘Hello, are you fine?’ It was my mom on the other end.
‘Yea, I’m doing great’ though it was really annoying getting call at 5 in these chilly winter dawn, I tempt myself hearing the comforting voice of mom after a long time.
‘Did you felt the tremor?’ She was sounding weird.
‘Yes I did’ I was annoyed with the pointless talk she was making by calling so early.’ I always put my cell on vibration mom; if you call me this early I’ll fell the tremor?’
‘No No’ she was making me more confused. ’Didn’t you felt the earthquake?
‘What???’ I almost jumped from the bed.
‘Ok, Ok its fine, now go back to sleep’ and then she hung up.
‘First the call and then the threat of the earthquake, How can I go back to sleep?’ So I just closed my eyes and started thinking about the swift call that lasted for a few second. Why she hung up on me so soon? After screwing for a moment with my head I drew the conclusion ‘Move straight from your head to your heart stupid, it’s because she was worried about you after the earthquake and she didn’t want to kill your sleep after knowing you are safe’. I thanked god for putting on the lap of the great mother on the earth and rolled around my bed waiting for the alarm to beep.

On the flip side I have a different story. During Tihar, it was London derby (Gunners vs. the Blues) and you can guess how the Blue’s fan like me was holding in the second half. The third one from Van Parsi (and Arsenal 5-3 Chelsea) ignites my frustration, I threw the remote controller and the gentleman’s talk (muji Chelsea aja ni haryo) just slipped from my tongue in front of the dad.
‘How dare you talk like that in my house?’ Firstly he was unsettled with me for not letting him watch the news and secondly the quarter life crisis son was talking like a gentleman. So it was time for some serious stuff.
‘What did I do now?’ I was not sure about the words coz they just slipped.
‘You watch TV for the whole day without studying and how dare you show your big mouth (‘एक त दिनभरी टि.भी हेर्छ, पढ्नु गुढ्नु छैन, अझ मुखमुखै लाग्छ’)’ he was furious at me.
‘What?? There is nothing to read, I finished my college dad, and tell me what I should do’.
‘Go and Study’ is his best dialogue and for me it’s the one I hate most. Even after finishing the college he didn’t stopped to hit me with it. Weird isn’t it; your dad scolding you for not studying even after graduating from the college.
‘Just do something good, don’t waste your time watching this stupid football’. I didn’t know why he was blaming football.
‘You know what; you are never satisfied whatever I do’ I was losing my mind.
‘If I became second, you say why didn’t you became first and if I became first you say why didn’t you became board first, I don’t know what’s wrong with you, you never fell happy with your son’s success’ I banged the door of the living room and left.
Later at the dinner it was dead silence. I had no words left to unzip my lips after that altercation. Mom was busy with her chores. So it was up to dad to break the ice.
‘There is a story for you my son, do you want to hear it’. (कान्छा एउटा कथा छ, तेरो लागि; सुन्छस्)
I didn’t dare to look at his face nor did I care to utter a word. I went to feed myself and remained silent.
‘Ok, anyway let me say it’ and he started. The story went like this.

Once there was a famous writer who has earned name and fame. But the writer’s father always used to scold him for not writing a single good piece. Though the world praises him as the best writer, his father used to tell him he was bullshit. The writer was angry with his father attitude toward him, he thought his father was mad. He started planning a ploy to destroy him. One day when the father was in his room the writer waited outside with the sword in his hand. While waiting he heard his mother talking with the father.
‘Why don’t you praise your son for his good work?’ the mother was asking, ’you make him sad by undermining his work’.
‘Haha’ the father laughed. ’You know my darling, if all started praising our son he will run after the success and one day he won’t be able to write good. I always scold his so that he will always strive for the excellence’.
Hearing the answer the writer felt so guilty that he killed himself with the sword as a penance. And the world lost one of the best writers in the history.

Dad finished his story. ‘Did you like the story?’ he didn’t stopped to hear my reply. He left the diner and reached for the sink. Though my head was still bowing to pay respect to the food mom has made with quite excitement, I raised my eyebrows to get the glimpse of his silhouette. He opened the tap, rinsed, and dried himself with the towel. He was smiling at me when he left the kitchen. I was as dumb as the statue at the kitchen table wondering myself why these human in the form of father are so knotty. Why do you have to decipher the hidden love and care from their words? But it’s quite difficult because there is no universal algorithm to do it. And you are left without the clue wondering do they really care about you? Why can’t they call you straight and ask ‘Hello, Are you fine?’ or was it because the silent would connect in a way a word would never could.

Thus to conclude I say the love of the two greatest human being on the earth is a flip love. One express even though you don’t want other won’t even though you want.